Saturday, May 27, 2006

My dad's body is totally deteriorating. He's having brain surgery soon which is supposed to help him a lot but he keeps talking about who gets what when he dies. He is trying to prepare me for his death but the truth is i faced the reality when i first saw both my parents rolling around the house with walkers. That was the worst moment of my life and i will truthfully say that i cried about it. I can't talk about this stuff with my girlfriend because i don't want her to see me in that state. i don't want to tell my friends for the same reason. The school counseler can only nod her head and basically think that the situation sucks. i cloak my emotions so no one knows what is going on, and its working very well. Its hard to even look at my dad anymore and to just think that in a few months he may not be there for me anymore. gone. forever.


morethanjustajock
02:54:21 AM

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

that sucks. I know how much it can suck to have to hid emotion like that.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's awful. How old are they?

Anonymous said...

they are both 59.

Anonymous said...

I guess you should be getting a lot more sympathy than what you've gotten. but the truth is, people dont know what to say because they dont understand. they dont know what its like. maybe you're looking for someone that understands? most people dont. you have to live with that. but just because they dont understand doesnt mean they dont want to help. if you're g/f really loves you, you should tell you how bad you are and she'll be there if she really cares. you dont have to tell the world. but tell your close friends and they will be there for you.

appreciate what you have with your dad and share your emotions with your family because they are the only that truly understand what you are going through and what you are loosing..

i dont understand but i know its not easy. and for that i'm sorry.

best of luck to you.

Graffiti Pastry said...

What the fuck kind of thing to say is "that sucks." or "How old are they?"

The best thing one can do is offer their sincerest condolences.

OP, while I am not sure how to empathize, I offer you my most heartfelt sympathies.