Sunday, February 24, 2008

so this kid i know did some time in juvy,
and i was wondering if anyone could explain to me sorta what that could have envolved.

06:35:00 PM

can someone please tell me how to keep the posts in there origional formating when transfering them onto the site?

If you said you have a surprise for me... does that mean sex????? 

Is it bad that I hope it is???

06:08:00 PM

We’re All Just A Little Bit Pretentious

by an anonymous and angsty writer

In a world where every word is judged,
taken a scalpel to, and dissected until the meaning is irrelevant
but political correctness is key,
molding the world into a monotonous lifestyle,
where words are bland, 
dripping with the dull that is the day to day deluge of “damn I wish I had taken a chance,”
exists a group of individuals, 
the auteurs of culture,
resenting the very thing that is art,
and taking away all interpretations but their own, 
leaving my life dry and lonely, 
missing the moisture that was the long awaited public response to my work. 

Why would an artist,
an human being,
submit herself to the euthanasia that is critical analysis,
a form of spitting the remnants of last nights dinner, 
which have long gone rotten in the dewy, hellish, humid heat of an angry night,
in the face of a representative of the freedom of expression? 

“Leave me be,” 
is all I can cry, 
hoping that the oversized and overpowering fans of censorship 
will not carry my words away on the wind 
as I run after them, 
hoping to seize on to the “m” and be carried off to a better place. 

But alas,
I am left to deal with the shit of humanity, 
the pungent aroma that is secreting through the pores of every opponent of art, 
of life,
of the “my country ‘tis of thee” way of being. 
And whilst I deal, 
they sit in their penthouse flats
swishing their glasses of Crystal
as they speak of the sensitivities of smart senators amongst
their smarmy swarms of social superiors.

06:06:00 PM

Im tired of anal sex in porn, I mean Straight anal sex for that matter, I don't like it much its just not what floats my boat or tickles my pickle but there I am playing the skin flute and that spicy little Asian suddenly has a dick in her ass. I'm sorry if its your thing then great but I find it kinda gross, dicks and shit don't mix well for me in fact not much mixes with shit very well. What I need is a warning message to tell me if a porno has anal sex in it before I watch it. That way I wont even try to start churning out some man mayonnaise to a hot chick getting pounded by some sort of beastly trouser snake only to be interrupted when it ventures into the final frontier. Why must all porn makers assume that Guys love to see Women getting there bungholes massacred? Do women really even get pleasure from anal sex? It really doesn't seem real pleasurable to me however I've never been pounded in the ass so the closest thing I know of would be laying down a big brown butt baby after a big meal. This experience doesn't really excite much. To get back to my point and hopefully sum up this ultimately pointless rant; I don't enjoy watching anal sex in porn movies and in the quest for more and more raunchy porn I believe the screen quality of normal old vag style screwing is being lost in an effort to make porn more exciting.

04:42:00 AM

am i invisible to you? or do you just not realize that I too have a vag? because you act like you are interested... and then you decide to talk to me about other girls.

are you that thick?

i baked you a cake and then cried into it because i knew you wouldn't understand.

so... why do i still care?

11:20:00 PM

Seriously WTF stuco...
It was all planned out, Physics Trip, Prom, 420: the best weekend EVER
you ruined it.
For shame.

04:34:00 PM

Friday, February 22, 2008

I'd like to take a poll-

I know it's in the name, but is oral sex really sex?

03:24:00 PM

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

i'm sorry i outed you. i didn't mean to.

09:35:00 PM

don't you dare seduce me!

i told you no and i mean it.

and if you try again, i can guarantee i will not be able to control myself... really...

so please. for the sake of keeping my pants on... don't do it.

10:30:00 PM

sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex

08:47:00 PM

Sunday, February 17, 2008

You know what really grinds my gears?

The gross mistreatment of condoms by so many people.

I saw a group giving out free condoms the other was about twenty degrees outside. This is not okay.

Condoms should be kept at room temperature.

Don't leave them in the glove compartment for long periods of time. Putting them in your wallet or in your back pocket is not okay. I don't care if it's only going to be there for a night; your ass is a hot thing that can weaken the latex. If you need to take them out with you, at least put them in a purse or something.

As for the rest, just read the damn box: it tells you EVERYTHING...

Except this (which is my little gift to you): To test your condoms (after you're done boning), just fill them with water; if water leaks out anywhere, you know you have a breach, and you can go get some emergency contraception and use it when it's most useful (which is as close to the event as you can possibly get, btw).

I'm not gonna pull any of my philosophy on when and how you should have sex (at least in this installment), but if you're going to do it, realize that babies are a serious possibility.

Take your safety that seriously, alright?

I'm sure some of you will come back at me with "well I did such and such and my girlfriend isn't preggers." Well I congratulate you. That doesn't mean you're not stupid.

I have spent the last seven hours trying to contact you.
At first I was mad at you for ignoring me and apparently canceling our plans. Then I just wanted to know you were alive.

I am going to wait up all night for you to call back and let me know that you're safe, because I care about you. And then tomorrow I will find out that you were okay the whole time, that you just "forgot" to call me back or "didn't have time."

Caring for you hurts so much sometimes.

01:25:00 AM

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

You know what really grinds my gears?

It's when people don't understand the phrase "have my cake and eat it too."

So once and for all, I need to clear it up for everyone who reads this site:

The phrase is not referring to someone owning a piece of cake and then being denied the right to eat said piece of cake. It is instead referring to the impossibility of having a piece of cake ready to be eaten and also eating that piece of cake. You either have it, or it's in your belly (or somewhere in between), it can't be both at the same time.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

mmmm. I probably just made myself really vulnerable.

10:45 PM


8:49 PM

i want to go to prom with you, but i want you to ask me.

12:43 PM

take advantage of every opportunity, explore every possibility, because one day when the past is behind you, you will not be able to and you will find your self sitting there wondering why you didn't.

3:51 AM

Saturday, February 09, 2008

I am so hot for my scene partner from drama class, it's not even funny.

2:43 PM

Some girl that i don't like asked my to be her fuckbuddy, i have no idea what this entails, what the hell do i do?

7:50 PM

Wednesday, February 06, 2008


how the hell are you so goddamn charming?

09:51:00 PM

Monday, February 04, 2008

Are prom tickets sales next week? If so,


07:19:00 PM

what the eff is up with not posting these posts? It's february 4th for christ's sake!

05:34:00 PM

i love him. and i know he loves me.
we may never tell each other, in fear of ruining the amazing friendship we have.

that and he lives 700 miles from me.

07:17:00 PM

I'm really spooked from watching paranormal videos and now I can't sleep. I feel like a douche.

12:14:00 AM