Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Lately I have been considering losing my virginity. Not to anyone I especially like, it's just that I'm 18 and being a virgin in such a sex-crazed world seems kind of pointless.


Anonymous
03:09:00 AM
9/30/2009

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

:[

Anonymous said...

I didn't lose my virginity until 20. I pretty much felt exactly the same as you when I was 17 and 18, but I waited for it to mean something with someone.

Anonymous said...

thats sad. don't do that.

Anonymous said...

Losing your virginity just for the sake of losing it rather than for the desire to be sexual with someone you care about seems pretty pointless, too.

op said...

Um, okay, I guess I won't.

But then what do you do when good looking people clearly want to have sex with you and you are bored and never put that much stock virginity anyway and every day you are a little more tired of being propositioned by old men at the bus stop?

Anonymous said...

Well, I mean, if you want to have sex with someone and they want to have sex with you, then do it. Nothing wrong with that. It could be fun! It just sounded from your post like you didn't really have any desire to have sex, you just wanted to chuck the "virgin" label. And that's not a good reason to lose your virginity.

It's more appropriate to think about "virginity loss" as "sex-life gain," and you should really only gain a sex life if you've decided that you truly want one, not because you're tired of being a virgin. Being a virgin is the "null" state here; you're not really "losing" anything when you lose your virginity and gain some sexual experience. There's essentially nothing for you to want to "get rid" of. You should ask yourself, "Do I want a sexual experience?" If yes, then have some (safe!) sex. If no, then don't worry about it. If you're not that into the idea of sex to begin with, having sex won't lift any burdens or change anything for you.

It's a shame that our culture has this way of making "losing your virginity" seem like some big, monumental thing that you just need to do, like making sure you "lose it" by some certain age is more important than having sex because you sincerely want to have sex. Having sex for the first time isn't like getting a vaccination or doing your homework. It shouldn't be something you approach with the idea "Well, I better get this over and done with." I agree with you that virginity in and of itself isn't all that special, but I do think that sex is special enough that there's no reason to do it until you genuinely want to. Wanting sex makes it feel a whole lot better.

Also, losing your virginity will not stop men from propositioning you at the bus stop. Those men sound like creeps and they should fall into a dumpster full of broken glass.

Dr. A said...

I think that if you want to have sex, certainly don't let the worry of "Should I lose my virginity?" stop you. However, I am really of the opinion that what is important is less the first time you have sex and more the first time you have sex with a given person.

Anonymous said...

Virginity is overrated.

Anonymous said...

i think that virginity is still precious and, though i didnt wait, i wish i had to be pure for my husband. its something i cant take back, but i wish i could. and i don't say that about many things.

Anonymous said...

^I understand your regret, but I wouldn't worry that having lost your virginity to someone else will make your relationship with your husband any less special. Any guy worth marrying will not hold your past against you.