Notice
"Wake County Public Schools will be closed on Thursday, Feb. 1 due to inclement weather."
Have a fun day kids.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
I have no friends and nobody likes me. Every time I try to open up to someone, I get rejected to my face. I guess it's just because I'm so many undesirable traits, and so far, I have found nothing that I'm good at, no talent whatsoever. Nobody respects me, or values what I say. I have nobody to turn to, but I would really like someone.
But these undesirable things are me, my personality, and I can't help that I'm me. What am I supposed to do, become this happy but fake person? There's a general social stigma, that you must "be yourself" to be really be accepted by society. Many go as far as to say, "I hate fake people." But I've been myself all throughout life, and nobody likes me for myself. So what am I supposed to do about it? Change?
Anonymous
09:38:50 PM
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Monday, January 29, 2007
Sunday, January 28, 2007
i want to apply to a boarding school. but contrary to popular belief my family is not wealthy we definatly dont have the 35,000 a year. & i'm not ever sure what schools to apply to... most of the application dates have passed... oh and i dont think we qualify for tuition assistance...
any ideas?
btw i dont think i could get in on the schools smart people money because i dont have the best grades...
Anonymous
11:55:47 PM
I am sometimes dishonest, and almost never brutally honest.
But I will be now:
I think you were incredibly selfish tonight.
You thrive on drama, and you know it. You seek it out and it feeds you.
You're smarter than this, and that is why I respect you more than other people.
Except on nights like this.
Anonymous
09:52:56 PM
How does one measure intelligence?
I think that I am reasonably intelligent, but not very smart. Or the other way around, as I can't remember which is which.
It bothers me, often, that I have so much trouble formulating opinions on things. Is it through ignorance, which is bad in itself, or simply because I am bad at thinking for myself? Neither is a good thing, though I'd say that the second is almost worse than the first. Ignorance can be more easily corrected.
I am good at learning things. I am good at learning concepts and abstract ideas, and fairly good at picking up information. But I am terrible at knowing some of the most obvious, current things and am terrible at holding strong opinions on most things.
I want to figure out why, so that I can try and fix it, try and repair the damage if it is not too late. I also want to be less ignorant of current affairs and events that I should know. I want to become more globally minded.
But the trouble is, I don't know how, or where to start.
How does one go about learning to really think for themself?
All of the things that I have learned will not do me any good if I can't even use them properly.
Anonymous
09:47:52 PM
Heres a secret, that you all should benifit from.
ok, so one year ago when I was 17, I met this girl in an online forum. We started talking on aim and stuff, and I learned she lived two states away from me, and she told me she was 16, we became good friends,then one day she told me she 'loved me', no joke, i was a little a freaked out by that and thats when i started to not take things seriously, she sent me her pic and asked for mine, jokingly, i sent her a fake one, then i started telling her i was falling for her too,
just to see where it would go, we exchanged phone numbers, and started texting and calling eachother, she was crazy, she'd call me at 1 in the morning to have phone sex or sometimes cry to me about her family issues, and at those times i gave her the best advice and never lead her in the wrong direction. then one day she told she wasnt 16, she was only 14, so i became even more freaked out, at this point this had been going on for about 7 months, and i thought it was time to call it quits, so i told her the truth about everything, and she started crying and all but after a little while she said she didn't care, she'd call me in the middle of the night to seduce to have phone sex, but id say no and hang up, and then she stoped everything stopped, and i started to miss her, which came to me as a surprise, so a month later i called her, and said i missed her, and then it was all back to 'normal' once again, we made a deal that one of us would come to visit the other over summer, after 3 months , i realized no this really isnt right at all, and just like that one day i stopped replying to her texts,calls, emails, i changed my number, changed my aim, but till this day time to time, 8 months later, i still get emails from her asking me why i stopped just like that without any explanation.
ive stopped going to any online forums, chat rooms whatever, and the moral of the story is DONT TRUST STRANGERS ONLINE
Anonymous
05:10:03 PM
Saturday, January 27, 2007
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
dear diary: my teen angst bullshit has a bodycount. i believe that it's 6 going on 7 now.
i'll hide you in my walls
your body will never be found
i'll wear your skin as a suit
your friends will like you more than they used to.
Anonymous
10:45:51 PM
[Song: "Ride The Wings Of Pestilence" by From First to Last.]
So this is what happens when I let my guard down?
I had other things to worry about like my future, my GPA, getting into college, and my parents expectations. I didn't have the time to call you. I'm sorry that I hurt you. You are the best that I've ever had the opportunity to have and that opportunity has presented it's self far to often to have it end so quickly. Maybe I'm your flavor of the week or something. Maybe I'm just not used to this. I've always been the one doing the hurting in the past, never the one getting hurt. It was bound to happen sooner or later. I guess this is what happens when you're still young and stupid.
Anonymous
10:37:14 PM
i'm quiet. and catholic. and apparently these two factors are enough to convince everyone who doesn't know me really really well that i am a goody-goody and never do anything wrong. in fact, some people seem to find it necessary to censore themselves around me. i hate it. it's not like i've never heard "the f word" (or said it myself) and i definitely don't hate people that use it. i'm not perfect, and i don't want to be ostracized from the rest of high school society because i have "higher moral values" or something, but i don't know how to change my image without changing myself in the process.
Anonymous
09:10:08 PM
i made a girl cry at my school's winter formal.
i'm a girl btw. she thought i hated her. but since then i've realized she's a very nice and amazing person.
most of my friends are calling me spineless because i only acted like that to her because of what one friend said.
i guess they're right...
Anonymous
08:11:07 PM
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Monday, January 22, 2007
Sunday, January 21, 2007
She reaches out her dying fingertips
And brushes his forehead.
The electricity shocks through him
As she writhes in misted agony
on the dead sand
his soul is shot with color and patterns
of all her nerves firing at once
and he feels boundless skies and great echoeing spaces
and wind from across the Great Divide
within him
Her dry cracked lips grin morbidly
Her eyes are the
Color of the End of the World
And he feels a current race in him
Back to the primordial swamp
he reaches the rainy fingertips of his brain
to the beginning of the world
where fireflies lurk like stars or secrets
and the foxfire will one day coalesce into human flesh
Begin at the beginning
There is a path that appears only in the rain
it is the only way through this
steaming forest of bones
You walk through, and the bones click together with a strange moaning
and up ahead you see nailed to a ribcage
what once was THE GOD OF CROSSROADS
Reduced from his former glory,
now clad like an old soldier in bonny bloody blue
but his eyes are still the clear
color of the eyes of a heretic who knows he speaks the truth
Reflected in them are HER last words
He bends down and kisses your forehead with lips like dry leaves or spiders,
Says
I bless you in the name of all that is good and beautiful and true
And you are filled with fire and pure water
And there at the heart of things you make a wish
And the wish is the first domino
Watch as they all fall into place
She runs away,down the dark twisted lines of the future her bare feet pounding on the earth the rhythms of her heart
And her face is made of rivers
and her silhoette against the rising sun
Is a dream of Africa
In the smooth dark highway that is the future
Only the gods pick up hitchikers
And you and I stand here
with the disenfranchised youth
Here at the end of all things
they are Western dancing
the few who chose to face
the End of the World
Instead of ending their lives on their own terms with the personal seduction of cold steel
Night is a prostitute who
stalks in dark stillettos down the abandoned street
She would sell herself to the End of the World, but it will have none of her sharp yellow teeth
and April promises
It was always more of a voyeur, anyways
And we watch as the angels
Ascend from the subway gratings
one of them wears Marylin Monroe's dress
Watch as the devils, the children of
Lucifer, the bearer of the light
Come out from under the all-night hot dog stands
and kneel and weep
And we dance and feel through the soles of our feet the heartbeat of the long-forgotten Planet Earth
Here at last at the end of all things
And it flickers through us like the voice at the end of the line in a long-distance call
And we feel it rush inside us
speeding to a crescendo
And an angel kisses my forehead
And a devil sweetly draws
A star on my cheek
and I go to stand with the mortals
the children of the beautiful
I sewed my lips shut with coarse black thread and a needle like silver desire
So if I screamed, I could still hear the music
And I look at you and nod
But I do not get closer to your sweet surrender
We must face this alone
The shock wave shimmers electric blue
Through us, tracing every line of passion, everything your parents never knew
There are boundless skies in the hollow of my throat and the space between breaths
Now our hearts are laid bare, terrible shriveled things that they are
Pulsing and naked in the light of infinity like an August night or the number Eight
The human sacrifice looks deep into the eyes of the tenderly smiling priest
The man looks at the faces around him set in anger
drops his hands
And lets the darkness take him
their dark eyes speak of all that was lost and all that was given and all that waited for them
The last domino falls into place
with a sound that is heard around the world and the music stops but you feel radiant with a tangible finality
And I look into your eyes and the shock sparks through me with the electric blue that is the human connection, that is your fingertips brushing mine for the first time, is the hoarse timbre of your voice in the early morning, that is the light in the clear day of your love, is that electric blue ramming into my veins
Is the human connection
Is the Color of the End of the World
Anonymous
12:30:12 AM
Friday, January 19, 2007
The quiet can scrape
all the calm from your bones,
but maybe it should.
Maybe we need to be hollowed
to get up and grow,
and stop fucking around,
to kick off our braces and start straightening out.
Let's sift through the static
to find a simpler sound
Let's sift through the static
to find a simpler sound...
simpler sound than the shit that's clouding our heads now.
Anonymous
02:15:05 AM
[Song: "Cotton Crush" by Kevin Devine.]
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
i walk in to my second hour class on the first day of second semester and... he's there. i've done all i could to avoid him 1st semester, even though i was completely over and done with everything. HE's made it awkward, NOT me. i said i wasn't going to initiate contact anymore; i'm done with trying to make friends every time he decides to wig out and not talk to me. fuck that shit.
he sits right behind me, too. so i can't focus to save my life.
fuck, i hate this semester.
Anonymous
09:05:15 PM
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
The real reason I hide my top friends on myspace is because none of my 297 'friends' actually qualify as a friend.
Im sure no one actually cares if I am their friend or not, and Im sure no one really cares if I'm dead or alive.
After texting 8 people and wanting to hang out with them, all of them gave me a lame excuse not hang out with me, so I decded to go to the effing library and sspend my evening there, reading a stupid book.
Anonymous
10:22:51 PM
One of my best friends is in a serious relationship. She is very in love with the guy, and theyve been together for a couple of years. Over the summer she met someone who lives far away that she really liked. She briefly thought she was maybe in love with him, but it passed and now she is very glad she stayed with her boyfriend. She told me once that she NEVER cheated on her boyfriend.
I have recently heard from a reliable source that my friend did indeed cheat on her boyfriend, and only told one person about it (whom she is no longer friends with). This person told a bunch of people, and pretty much everyone knows except her boyfriend.
I don't really care whether or not she cheated on her boyfriend, but I really care whether or not she lied to me. Is there a tactful way for me to find out, or should I just ignore it? I can't stand to think she might have lied to me.
Anonymous
08:58:23 PM
Monday, January 15, 2007
I'm angry, but I don't know who to direct it to: my friends or myself.
On one hand, I feel jipped because no one has given me any feedback whatsoever for getting into college.
On the other, I feel like an idiot for expecting feedback when I know the vast majority of enloe students will end up going to college anyway.
Anonymous
05:19:11 PM
nifong is a faggot. by the fact that they keep dropping charges, it has become clear that they have had no case from the beginning. it enrages me that they can simply point fingers and ruin peoples lives like that. this is ridiculous. even if the defendants successfully argue and win the case, they had to go through all that hardship and bs just because some worthless bitch has to strip for a living, accidentally got herself pregnant and wants to blame someone else for it. its true that they were stupid for hiring a stripper, and its also true that shes stupid for being a stripper, but its becoming clearer and clearer that this is almost entirely fabricated. its the salem witch trials all over again, a worthless girl points a finger and by her word alone so many people get caught up in her venemous web of malice. in response to her delivering the baby, shes a stripper, she probably has sex like 20 times a day. stupid worthless bitch.
Anonymous
04:28:45 PM
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Im tearing myself apart.
I've been obsessed with this one girl for a couple months now, but i'ts become obvious that she has little or no interest in me that way, but we have become very good friends.
Now, im trying to do everything I can to get over her and move on, but whenever i so much as see her or hear her voice, i fall for her again. All i can do now is ignore her compleatly, which goes against how i feel, and hurts me even more.
What hurts the most, though, is that I may be losing a friend, too, in all of this. I honestly have no fucking clue what to do, and it's emotionally destroying me.
Anonymous
10:29:01 PM
So here I am, 5:50 in the morning, in my dorm room. I have been in my dorm room since around 8sh. It is a friday night. My friends are either shitfaced or out getting shitfaced. Anything to forget your sorrows eh?
Here's the cute part though: while they are probably having the time of their lives with equally shitfaced people, I will be so effortlessly alone, all in the ignorable name of self-righteousness.
I cant break now,
though i am surely broken
Anonymous
05:55:11 AM
Friday, January 12, 2007
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
There are so many girls that I am just friends with but that would never consider me more than that. And I really really really want a date to prom and a girlfriend so basically, I have no idea what to do.
Whenever I see a girl I like, I hang out with her, and she becomes my friend, which was my problem in the first place.
I swear, for like a year my dad thought I was gay.
Anonymous
09:46:36 PM
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Monday, January 08, 2007
Sunday, January 07, 2007
i confess:
that i don't know if we're friends or not.
i care about you, and i want to talk to you. but everything is going crazy in my mind. i'm sorry. i'll call.
i care about you too, but you're a different story. i didn't think that we could be friends, just because i'm not usually friends with my ex, but we seem okay. truce?
Anonymous
11:19:52 AM
Saturday, January 06, 2007
I like you alot, and I think you might like be back. Yet somehow I'm not sure if a relationship is totally the best thing for us...You don't seem to be totally comfortable on that idea, not that I've brought it up before...
You also dont seem that comfortable anything remotly physical, even hugs. I dont know if I could date someone who I would feel awkward even HUGGING. What action should I take? Do you want me to put you on the spot?
Anonymous
11:20:46 PM
This is so fucking ridiculous.
I get into unc-ch, the school I want to go to, and it changes nothing. My parents say "study for midterms" and when I say "well, at least after midterms I don't really have to work anymore because I'm a senior and in college" they reply, "No, then there are APs"
WHAT THE FUCK. I am so sick of not being able to hang out with my friends when I want to. I am so sick of having to study for tests that have no meaning anymore. I am so sick of them not understanding that I just don't give a shit anymore.
Anonymous
12:44:29 PM
Friday, January 05, 2007
Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young.
dittolove6
11:17:36 PM
i hate how she wants you to be this cool half-something mix who listens to good music and dresses alright, who all the boys like, but like her more.
i hate how she wants you to be naive and get yourself fingered by some sort of cute boy, not realizing what you're getting into.
it's a trap.
but i love how you realize that.
Anonymous
10:14:43 PM
I got deferred
Not that I really wanted to go there (UNC), but it still sucks. What else could I have done?
Queen Sekaf
06:17:55 PM
Thursday, January 04, 2007
"In October 2005, with the growing popularity of Facebook, the creator of Tangst also began a group on Facebook for Tangst entitled "Tangsty." This group has accounted for much of the increased traffic on the Tangst website."
I can't find it anywhere! What happened to the Tangst group on Facebook??????
Anonymous
08:13:49 AM
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Monday, January 01, 2007
i'm so fucking tired of my parents guilt-tripping me. it's MY birthday. and we don't enjoy each other's company so why should we be forced to go to what can only be the most awkward dinner (that won't even be enjoyable) ever?
my friend is in town for three days. i can almost guarantee that i'll have more fun with her. my dad's leaving for mexico tomorrow, on my birthday, so he wants to "celebrate" it today.
"dad, she's in town for three days."
"yeah, that's fine do whatever you want, i'm in town for one."
fuck you. you're such a fucking black hole, you suck the fun out of life. this year is starting off very poorly.
Anonymous
06:18:34 PM
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