I hope I wake up tomorrow morning.
-Anonymous
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Sorry Boys and Girls
My bad on not posting these things earlier guys; I've been both busy and extraordinarily lazy these days.
I also apologize for the formatting. I had to knock out 11 in short order so I didn't format them in the normal style.
-PChis
THE ROPE
I go places, wondering if you'll be there. I admire myself through your eyes. Oh yes, I recognize obsession, with it's warm distorted view of my world. You've made me let go of meaningless things that meant everything; lost jewelry, tombstones, chestnut colored horses; things I once hold on to to survive. Thank you. But I wonder, when you're gone, will I completely lose my grip?
Anonymous
1/14/2009
08:01:00 PM
Five girls lying in the dark, trying to be quiet as we wait for my mom to fall asleep, muffled giggles escaping here and there.
Four girls sneaking out of the house, E already asleep, I know she's faking, but I don't tell, the others are too excited by the possibilities of tonight to notice.
Three boys we meet in the park, the ones that our guy friends who care told us to stay away from, but flirting with danger, so to speak, is too enticing.
Two. The number of times we have to stop the boys from following us back, we don't want them to know where I live.
One night we let loose. We're the good girls, we don't do things like this. It wasn't all that bad, but it's enough to make us feel like we're living on the edge. Something we may never mention again but when we pass each other in the halls we'll laugh and think ourselves in control.
Anonymous
1/14/2009
07:53:00 PM
When we snuck to the ridge it was harder to tell whether it was closer to dawn or dusk, and as tiny speakers played music without words you revealed a side of yourself that I had never seen. It was there, as you carefully explained the rotating constellations and in the way you held me, protectively, in your arms to keep me warm. I was happy to endure the teasing glances of our friends as i traced patterns on your cheek because I know they approve, and later as they slept, I curled myself into your chest and found myself in the place I most wanted to be.
Anonymous
1/14/2009
07:34:00 PM
the people posting on here are sad. You all should be happy. Become happy by watching this awesome video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw4MQ3c8oYw
:D
envoi
1/14/2009
04:36:00 AM
Yesterday I bought a pack of cigarettes. Since I had filled in my mail-in ballot while I was still seventeen, this was the first really grown-up thing I had done since my eighteenth birthday.
Like most rites of passage it was easier than I had imagined. I specified which brand, let the man at the counter inspect my ID, and declined his offer of matches. Nobody looked surprised and I walked home, feeling a little older.
The remorse that came afterwards made me feel older still.
It was not my money and not my lungs, but somebody paid and somebody will smoke them, someone I am fond of, and I am using him and his addiction to fuel my own rebellion. I am in no position to make him quit but I shouldn't be an enabler. He could quit now if nobody gave him cigarettes, but somebody will always give him cigarettes because he has such a beautiful smile.
I could say that I did it for love but I don't think I love him.
Anonymous
1/13/2009
08:16:00 PM
I had a dream last night that finally made me realize:
I'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend, I've just learned to live without him. When I visited high school and he went out of his way to come talk to me I was nervous, happy, sad, and all sorts of other things. This is so hard to come to terms with but it's true. In the dream we were back together and he held my hand and kissed me and everything in the world was fine. He's all I think about with my other boyfriend.
Damnit.
Anonymous
1/12/2009
12:33:00 PM
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Nothing is more beautiful than the way I feel when we drive through the deserted parking lot blasting your horrible music and sharing swigs from a glass bottle. The orange glow of the streetlamps illuminates your face and I silence my ringing phone as our lips meet. My heart does back flips. Your hand burns on my thigh. I love you, I think. And I shouldn’t. Somewhere, your girlfriend suspects nothing. I’d give anything to hold onto the feeling. I can’t go on without you. You ended it. Did the right thing. Stayed with the right girl. The pretty one, the good one. I used to be the good girl. I respect that even though inside, my heart cracks open. You made promises. Maybe in the future. Some hint in your smile, in your eyes, tells me this isn’t over. I’ll wait. "Friends?" I ask, feeling my fingers turn to ice. "Always," you remind me.
Anonymous
1/06/2009
06:12:00 PM
It's a fairly surreal story -- my ex-lover sends me a postcard, I write back, my reply is found by a drifter who starts writing to me fan letters, calling me thought-provoking and "a very solid and legit young woman."
We've been carrying on this odd correspondence for a while now, and I enjoy having a reason to check the mail, and while I'm thinking about M. I can't be worrying about J. who was doing so well for so long until he nearly killed himself with poisonous mushrooms.
Sometimes I even think I'm not in love with him anymore.
I've been spending my time flirting by letter, doing what I can to avoid thinking about him, reading the books that M. recommends, digging up CDs of M.'s favorite music, saving my money to leave home although at the moment I have nowhere specific to go. I'm rebuilding a life out of secondhand cassette tapes and fifty-dollar bills. For now that's almost enough.
M. took a photograph of J. when they were staying at the same house for a few days. I found it partly by accident, and he looks so sick.
It's a new year, and I've already done so much to put the past in its place, but for now I have to pause and raise my glass to missed opportunities.
Anonymous
1/05/2009
11:04:00 PM
Monday, January 05, 2009
Dude. You have a boyfriend. I'm sorry if you're not happy with him or whatever, but that doesn't mean you also get to have the guy I like. First of all, he's not into you. Sorry. Second, YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND. Third, ruining the entire day because you were jealous of me and him is such an immature way to react. If you expect to head to college pullin shit like that, you will get eaten alive by the real adults. Sorry, my dear. You're my friend, but you need to grow up. You can't have everything.
Just Another Girl
12:53:00 AM
1/04/2009
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Friday, January 02, 2009
I broke up with my boyfriend about a month ago and I have no regrets. He was no good for me and I probably should have done it sooner, but lately I've been so incredibly horny.
All I think about is masturbating and sex.
We came close to having sex several times, but we never did because he'd always have second thoughts at the last minute and decide he didn't want to yet.
I don't miss anything about him. I just miss the kissing and him touching and fingering me.
I miss the "sexual activity" so to speak
Anonymous
01/02/09
11:11:00 AM
Thursday, January 01, 2009
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