I just thought I would give you a poem to think about

Trip's Contemplation
She laughs, she moves
Bright lights flash the window
Illuminate her lips
My heart, for a moment, leaps.
She pauses and she smiles.
I miss a beat.
We go on talking, we're having fun.
Our life together has just begun.
How cute when she speaks.
I know that she'll always make me smile.
That 's eyes tugged at me that night.

We walk up her stairs.
She begins to hypothesize.
On things of unknown importance.
Her stance suggests my hope
Her easy glance.
She reaches down and touches my hand.
All the scenarios never equated to this.
I pause for a moment and believe.
Life is love, it isn't pain.
Everything in the world is right again.

or is it...
reality hits.

I'm as always, all alone
Bright lights blind me, remind me
Illuminate the empty seat.
An empty place inside
Like a mouth poised to devour my heart.
I'm just driving, no emotion.
Block it out ****(my name), too much pain.
What could have been... stop.
I can't express the pain inside
I try:
grinding gears, acid-etched, destroy my heart.

I walk to my room
Blurry-eyed imagination of a never-life.
Never knew how much I wanted this before.
Her smile.
I reach up and wipe encroaching tears.
For years I've wanted that
Times before, disappointment.